There's a yield for what you've sown, I will not leave you all alone. -Matt Wertz

A few weeks ago on a Wednesday we had quite a rough day in school. By the end of the day there were only 5 people on green, 10 on yellow, 3 on green, and 1 on red. Towards the end of the day I found one of my posters had been tampered with. So, naturally I asked the class what had happened. No one owned up to it. Kids have quickly learned in my class and are afraid to admit to doing anything. However, they also know that they might not get in trouble if they tell me the truth. Because no one had admitted anything and the day had already been so rough, I picked up the bean jar. The bean jar is basically like a mason jar that has beans in it. Everyday the kids are good, they get a handful of beans in the jar. When the jar is full, they get to have a party (which was full of a movie, cookies, carrots and peanut butter, popcorn and digestives). If they are ever especially bad, some of the beans come out. I started taking out the beans one by one saying that I was waiting for someone to tell me the truth. A few kids quickly ran up and said “I touched it but it was this morning.” Or “I touched it but it didn’t break.” So, the right person was not owning up. I kept on pulling out beans and the kids were besides themselves and distraught. The one kid in my class who has never had his stick flipped called out “A and M broke it! (initials used to protect privacy)” I knew he was telling me the truth, as he has never done a bad thing in his short life since being adopted. M lied to me, but that is nothing unusual and owned up to lying and had to flip her stick 2 times. In my class if you lie to me, you go straight to orange. I don’t tolerate lying! I kept pulling out beans and by the look in A’s eye’s I could tell he was lying and about to burst into tears because he knew what was coming. Finally he admitted to it, ran over to his desk, flipped his stick to red (even though it was only supposed to be on orange) and then started screaming and crying. The bell had just rung, so I quickly got the rest of the kids in line and gave them their “handshakes, high-fives, or hugs” despite some of them telling me repeatedly that A was crying. 

Sadly, I was already 2 hours late to a meeting so I also had to leave rather quickly. A does not have a good home life so Miss Agnes stays after school everyday to help him with his homework, or else it doesn’t get done. Plus, Miss Agnes has been with A for over a year now and knows him better, so she told me she would talk him down.
The next morning I talked to Miss Agnes about how A had reacted and what he had told her. Apparently after I left, he started throwing things and saying “I hate Miss Jean”. Imagine the drama in our lives? She talked to him about it and explained that it was not Miss Jean’s fault he was on orange. He was the one who told the lie. He would not have had to flip his stick if he had told the truth.
I took him outside and asked him if he was mad at me. He nodded yes. I asked him why, and he told me because I made him go on red. I quickly corrected him and reminded him that he indeed was not on red, but orange. We went into detail and talked about how if he had told the truth he would not have gotten in trouble and how it was not my mistake at all. He said that he understood, so I went on to talk about forgiveness and how I had forgiven him. I asked him if he knew that Jesus would forgive us too if we just asked for it. He told me “No, Jesus hates me.” This just broke my heart. In the past A has told me that he prays at night. From what I know he comes from a Muslim home, so I have been so confused by him. He has told me that when he prays at night by himself he thanks ‘God’ for punishing him. I quickly told him that NO, Jesus does not hate him. “Jesus loves you so much A! He just doesn’t like it when we lie or do other things that are sinful. Jesus loves you no matter what. He made you and is your father.” He seemed to understand a bit more, so I continued and I closed the conversation by praying and thanking God for his love and forgiveness and asking him to help us not to sin. This child is slowly opening up more and more. I just wish I understood more about his home life. That is truly one of the hardest parts of any teaching job, not being able to control how they are treated outside of the classroom.